Friday, September 30, 2011

New Young Justice Episode: Robin Makes His Triumphant Return!


 I like some DC stuff, I will admit (but Marvel's still my favorite company). One thing I like from DC is their Young Justice cartoon. The hiatus has been over (huzzah!) for more than two weeks and tonight's a new episode I can't wait to look up on YouTube tomorrow 'cause I don't get that TV no more (I read a lot, though!): "Home Front".

 Here's what Wikipedia says under the episodes description:

 When Mount Justice itself is attacked, can Artemis and Robin (the two teens without super-powers) save the Team (or even themselves) from the unknown invaders? 

  I am ecstatic, because I LOVE Robin in this. I've missed his wonderful Roxas Ventus Jesse McCartney voice. And his playing with the English language (why ISN'T anyone ever whelmed?). I wonder if they'll have a handwave for his being MIA last two episodes. Though I'll always prefer my idea (He was fighting off aliens, taking down the mob, and saving a British dude). And it seems like he'll get some more focus this episode. YAY!!!!!

 Oh yeah, and Artemis, too. YAY, SNARKY ARCHERS NAMED AFTER THE GREEK GODDESS OF THE MOON AND THE HUNT!

 This sounds awesome. The only thing that could make it better? If Robin wears a suit. Or fights with sai swords. Or wears a suit as he fights with sai swords. Just sayin'.

 Oh, or does all that, then does a number like THIS classic Justice League Unlimited moment.




...... 'Kay, I'll stop now.

 So, yay, Robin's back. I look forward to seeing this tomorrow on YouTube.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

RANDOM POST: Something 'Bout A Suit


 So I was watching the episode of Young Justice called "Targets". And afterwords, I was thinking: "Hey, Red Arrow sure could pull off a suit."

 Now before you start giving The Freak weird looks, I just want to say that suits are magic. It's like, throw some guy in a suit, and POW! They look awesome. Fictional AND real life. Throw a hobo in a suit: THEY LOOK GREAT! Throw a freaky guy in a suit: YOU LOOK FANTASTIC! THE POWER OF THE SUIT CANNOT BE DENIED!

 I'd list more specific examples, but there's no need. I dare someone to show me something to prove me wrong.

 Anyway, suits are awesome. That's all I gotta say.

 SUITS! They're oh so debonair....
SUITS!...
......
CURSE YOU NEIL PATRICK HARRIS! THAT SONG YOU SANG IS STUCK IN MAH HEAD!

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Weekend Artwork #6: Guess Who's In-Charge?


 Well, this was an eventful week. The Freak finally saw Phineas and Ferb: Across The 2nd Dimension (LOVED IT!!!), The Freak started referring to herself in 3rd Person occasionally, and a space satellite is going/has crashed to Earth! Wow!

 The Freak...I mean... I started thinking about the first episode of Phineas and Ferb, "Rollercoaster". Remember that line Candace says?

It's haaaaard to write out Candace's giggle...
 Yep, Candace is now/will be in charge. Kinda hilarious in hindsight, ya know? It was kind of a funny thought that came into mah head. I thought Candace came out pretty good, considering it was my first time drawing her. Though it helped to have a reference.

 Hope you enjoyed this weekend's Weekend Artwork. The Freak is out, PEACE!

Friday, September 23, 2011

Overused Plot Parody Theater #3: THE MISSION IS A LIE!!!

 I had trouble coming up with a new one, but I got it. Here's the perennial favorite, "Zim finds out his mission wasn't real". Oh, and be prepared for a cameo from someone from a previous story.....

 THE MISSION IS A LIE!!!

   "....Yeah, so, we lied to you. There is no mission. We just wanted to get rid of you. So quit calling, we hate you. Bye."

  The transmission cut. Zim just stood there. He didn't say a word. He didn't even acknowledge the strangely-camera-like fly orbiting around him.

 Turns out, the fly was Dib's, and he was watching it all. "I've been fighting a fake invader? He's just an outcast like me?" Dib said. "Wow, Zim seems to be in shock. What's this? I'm feeling sympathy for my enemy? And, speaking aloud again? Hmm.."

 Meanwhile, Zim saw the fly. "Eh.. INSECT! HOW DARE YOU INVADE ZIM'S BASE!? DIIIIIIIIIEEEEE!!!!!" He then promptly destroyed it. With LAZAHS! And screaming. Oh, the screaming....

 VIGNETTE TIME!

  DIB

  "Zim, I... guess I'm sorry about fighting you all the time. I didn't realize your situation. If you ever need to talk about it, I'm also... hated by my own kind. I'll be there for yo.."

 "SILENCE, WEIRD-ACTING DIB! YOU HAVE BEEN FED LIES! MY TALLEST WERE MERELY JOKING! HAHAHAHAHA! ZIM WILL NEVER COME TO YOU WITH ZIM'S PROBLEMS!!! However few they are...."

 "Zim, denial is nat..."

 "GAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!!!"

GAZ

 Zim was sitting on the steps of Skool, hiding from the Dib. He was acting peculiar, lately. Suddenly, he saw Gaz sitting by him.

 "Hey, you're probably thinking your species is horrible now. Well, mine is, too. So, if you want to, I dunno, go to Bloaty's sometime..."

 "NO! YOU ARE BEING PECULIAR, TOO, DIB-SISTER!"

 "Zim, I'm only nice for one hour a year, enjoy it while you..."

 There was a beep, Gaz looked at her watch. She smiled. "Time's up." She then beat Zim across the head, PAK, and chest area. Then she did something unspeakable and violent to his squeedly-spootch.

SPECIAL GUEST

 Zim walked home. Why did everyone act weird? Maybe that Dib had spied on him and his Tallest, then told Gaz what he saw. Suddenly, Zim heard a shriek and was tackled.

 He felt someone hug him. "Oh, my ZIM-MEEEE! I heard the Tallests' call through my special powers. Oh, I'm so sorry, baby. I'll always be there for you."

 "WHO ARE YOU, STRANGE FILTHY GIRL-HUMAN!"

 The girl flipped him around. She sat on him. She had multi-colored hair and a motorcyclist's outfit. "Oh, honey. You don't remember the love of your life? The one who makes your squeedly-spootch flutter?"

 "The squeedly-spootch isn't...."

 She ripped off her head, revealing a female Irken face with unnatural golden eyes highlighted with pink. "It's me, Jaz!" Jaz then started to lean in to kiss Zim, when.....

....

 Zim opened his eyes. He was on the street in his old man disguise. It was late. He noticed his skin grew back on his eyeballs. GIR was sleeping beside him. "GIR! I can see. I CAN SEE!"

 It was then Zim swore to NEVER sleep again. He would find a way to erase the need. The last thing he wanted were more horrific nightmares like that......

 THE END
  
The First Here.
The Second Here.

Wednesday, September 21, 2011

Update To The ZIM COSTUMES


  You know how long ago I spoke of the Bad ZIM Costumes? And I mentioned my worst nightmare: that they made an IZ costume as one of those girl costumes that look.... er.... well.... that nightmare has come true....
There are....so many things wrong with this....
 The Freak is sad now. It's not AS bad as I pictured. But still....... NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!

Sunday, September 18, 2011

Weekend Artwork #4 and #5: Lea and Teenpool Shenanigans!


 Sorry I didn't do this Saturday, but I'm doing it today! And I'm posting two today, since they have the same vibe.

 Pop Quiz? Who's Loveable Freak's favorite character from Kingdom Hearts? If you guessed Axel, you're correct! (If you also guessed Roxas, Vanitas, Luxord, and Xion, who are also up there, you are also correct and GET OUT OF MY MIND, TELEPATH!) Now who's one of Loveable Freak's favorite Marvel characters? You guessed Nightcrawler (He's one, if you've read one of my earlier posts I'll give you that..)? Yes, but he's not in this one. Hawkeye? True, but he was in last week's pic, I'm not using him this week. Rogue? Yes, but she's not in the pic either and I TOLD YOU GET OUT OF MY MIND! Human Torch? GAH! TELEPATH, YOU'RE MAKING ME UNCOMFORTABLE! And he's not in this. The answer is Deadpool.

 So, for funsies, I drew my beloved Axel and Deadpool in two pictures. The twist? Axel is in his original teenage persona, Lea, and Wade Wilson has been transformed into a teen, too. Here's the first, with  Teen DP in "civvies", and with zits.

Aw, he hasn't learned to use yellow textboxes... or swear yet.

 
 Between you and me, I think Deadpool and Axel would be awesome working together. Oh, the destruction. Them teaming would be the greatest/most hilarious/most terrifying possible thing to happen in the Kingdom Hearts series. Hey, Disney owns Marvel, it's a possibility. Those Square-Enix guys worked the miracle of fusing Final Fantasy and Disney together, they could find a way to work in Marvel...

Ahem... Sorry about that tangent. Here's the second one. It has two "special" guest stars.

You don't wanna know what "Teenpool's" been up to...
 Yep, "Teenpool" and Lea are antagonizing Teenage!Cyclops and Isa. This one's my favorite of the two pictures today. Who wants to make bets on the manner in which Teen-Cyclops and Isa kill our heroes?

 There we go! Come back Saturday when I (hopefully) post another one!

Friday, September 16, 2011

Everything I Know, I Learned From INVADER ZIM



 As I said in the post before, you're getting two posts today.

 You know how they have those "Everything I Know, I Learned From ______"? Like for Star Wars? And they have all sorts of crazy "facts" form the subject? Like for Star Wars, one of them was "Always let the wookie win". So a long time ago, I started one for, *drumroll*, INVADER ZIM!

 Here we go!


 Everything I Know, I Learned Form Invader Zim

*More organs means more human*Absorbency, Electrical Conductivity, and an unspeakable thing with a beaver and a toy taxi are the true tests of friendship*Humans don't have squeedly-spooches*If a big 'splody goes fast, it gets all bad*'sploding hurts*The FBI is a craft law enforcement agency founded in 1492 by demons to hunt aliens*There's waffle in waffles*It's four promotions from frycook to ruler of all mankind*Paranormal Investigation is a legitimate field of study*Mercury and Mars are spaceships*Martians worked themselves into extinction to convert their planet into a starship*People love shaking*Our society is a perilous house of cards destined to collapse under its own weight*The universe is just doomed*Dreams lead to hideous implosions*Paranormal Investigation isn't just a bunch of people who believe in anything, they also disprove the frauds*Space will eventually implode in on itself*Humans don't have arm-control nerves*People can't resist a fat man with presents*You can't pay for cookies with ham*Tuna is worth nothing*The moose is not wielding any sort of projectile weapons*We're not pigs*


So there it is! Anything I missed? This hard to read? Let me know in the magical comments and I'll fix this!

RANDOM BLOG FACT TIME! (APPRECIATION FOR STRANGERS!)

 Today you're getting two posts! So I'm going to state a random Fact.

 As of this post, I've gotten 16 views from outside the US (which is cool to me.)

 I've gotten:

  • One from Lithuania. (Hi! Mr./Ms./Mrs. Lithuanian Person! I don't know where that is, sadly, but I know it's in Europe and I appreciate you visiting once!)
  • Two from Russia. (Greetings, Russians! Sorry my Not Amused, Marvel post had nothing to do with Monty Python (yes, I know what you were looking up when you found my little blog. Scary, no?))
  • Four from The UK. ('Ello, good-ol' United Kingdom-ites! How's it going 'cross the pond?)
  • Four from France. (Bonjour, French! Stay unique!)
  • And Five from Germany. (Guten Tag, Germans! You know I have some German lineage? Just sayin'.....)
 So thanks all you Europeans for visiting! And for humoring me with a visit or two. I really appreciate it and hope you all come back sometime. Multiple times, preferably. Pweeeeease? Thanks!

 The Loveable Freak is Grateful.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Loveable Freak Talks About The News: Spongebob Bad For Little Childwen


*WARNING: MAY BE SOME MILD RANTING*

 So yesterday in the news they were talking about this study saying Spongebob was bad for small children (small being like under six). However could this be?

 Well, appartently, for children under six, it's not good for them to watch shows with such "fast pacing". It messes with their learning ability or something. It's better for them to watch shows with a slllllloooooooowwwwweeeerrrr pace. Basically, LITTLE KID SHOWS! And what did Nickelodeon have to say about this?

 They said, basically, "Well, four-year-olds aren't supposed to watch it. It's demographic is 6-11 year olds."

 Wow. That goes against the "all about the money, folks" belief I have about these companies. I mean, with all their "BUY OUR SPONGEBOB MERCHANDICE!" stuff. Anywho, aren't periferary demographics a good thing? Just sayin'.

 But you know, if parents didn't just camp their kids in front of anything with flashing, hypnotising, pretty colors, there wouldn't be this problem. Besides, if a certain episode of Pokemon is any indicator, putting kids in front of flashing colors is not always a good idea......

 Spongebob seems to get a LOT of issues about stuff, at least as one article I read pointed out. There was this whole "gay" thing from long ago (I think it's a long story that I don't know much info on, just that there was an issue). And appartently, there are some issues with  some "promoting global warming education" thing I just now heard about.

  My inner ZIManiac (my pitiful attempt of giving the fandom a cheesy, mildly stupid little nickname, like "Trekkies" have) feels the need to say something. Please, Spongebob fans, take no offense, I've been mature about the whole "ZIM Fans Hate SpongeBob" thing the majority of fans seem to have. I used to love SpongeBob, but the newer stuff.... eh. I TRY NOT TO BE THE MONGOOSE TO YOUR SNAKE!

 Anyway....

 I would like to point out ZIM never got too many controversies. Just the whole "It's dark" thing and apparently ONE murder trial thing relating to "Dark Harvest", but that was an isolated incident! The guy sounded like a psychopath. Just saying.

 So that's all I have to say about it! I leave you with this beautiful image:


Surprised There Was No Hooplah About THIS Giving The Childwen Nightmares

Monday, September 12, 2011

Overused Plot Parody Theater #2: Why Daddy?

 Hey, peoples! I'm doing another overused IZ Fanfic Plot Parody! Last week I did a "New Girl" Ripoff Parody and today here's the next one.

 The parody: Dib has Daddy Issues/Professor Membrane is an abusive Parent!

 This will probably be shorter, but on with the show!

 WHY DADDY?

  Dib sat on his bed, reading his book. Suddenly, he heard a thumping sound on his door. He rolled his eyes. "Oh, not again..." Suddenly, his father's floating monitor burst into his room.

 "Son! Why are you a failure!? You're insane!" The Professor shouted, bopping against Dib's head. "Ow. Ow. Dad. No. Stop." Dib said, deadpan. "IT'S TIME TO LEARN YOU A LESSON! WITH SCIENCE!" Dib sighed, got up, and walked away from his dad. Meanwhile, Membrane was shouting stuff and activated a tazer-thing.

 LATER, AFTER DIB WALKED! OH, YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN IT!

 ZIM opened his door, and saw Dib standing on his porch with a sleeping bag. "Can I stay at your base? My dad's having one of his "episodes" again..."

 ZIM glared at him. "No." And slammed the door.

 And Dib slept in the mall parking lot with the Horrible Rat People.....

.....Again.
 THE END

 This has been Overused Plot Parody Theater. Check back next week for..... whatever plot I use next!   

The Third Here.

Saturday, September 10, 2011

Weekend Artwork #3: Marksman Fight!

IT'S WEEKEND ARTWORK TIIIIIIMMMEE!!!

 Who's ready for something different?

 That's right, this is the first, non-ZIM/Jhonen Vasquez related WA work! It's a Marvel-related piece. It's in a sorta Feaux-Super-Deformed Anime Style!

Hawkeye: 1, Bullseye: 0

 Yeah, I kinda cheated with Bullseye's head and used the shape-tool on paint. Eh. But yeah, Bullseye just got owned. Hawkeye rules! He is bound to be awesome in The Avengers. So yeah, that's it.

So there.

 Loveable Freak is out! PEACE!

Monday, September 5, 2011

Story Time: Not Another New Girl! (Overused Plot Parody #1)

 So over on this other blog, The Half-World, theskepkitty (who runs the blog) wrote a list of overused  fanfic plots for INVADER ZIM. So I'm gonna mercilessly parody them! I already did an unfinished episode (but it wasn't a parody), so I'm gonna start with this one: A Rip-off of "Tak: The Hideous New Girl!"

COMMENCE READING!

NOT ANOTHER NEW GIRL!

 This was getting ridiculous.

 The new girl stood in front of the class beside Ms. Bitters. She was dressed in a polo and skirt from some strange store no one ever heard of: American Eagle. Her hair was blonde in a perky ponytail, and had glowy blue eyes. Ms. Bitters said, "Class,  I would like to introduce the newest, hopeless appendage to the student body. Her name is... Zo. Zo, if you have something to say, say it now, because after this moment, I don't wanna hear another sound from you!"

 "Deja vu," Dib thought. "Not this again!" ZIM thought.

 "Hiya! I'm Zo!" She looked over at Dib. "YOU CUTE! I LOVE YOU!" She leaped at Dib, only to be intercepted by yesterday's new girl, Vix. "Hands off my man!" Vix screeched. ZIM rolled his eyes. Another girl clinging to Dib. There had been an odd influx of new girls (and this two new boys, but one they ignored and the other.... made everyone feel awkward). They all generally seemed to be "in love" with either him or his nemesis. ZIM decided to take advantage of this by trying to make his admirers his "Army of DOOOOMMMM!!!!", but they were testing ZIM's nerves with every hour.

 Meanwhile, Zo and Vix finished their fight. Ms. Bitters, who seemed to ignore this, spoke up again. "You need a place to sit..." She pointed at Poonchy. "You! You're being transferred to the Underground Classroom!" ("Another one? That "classroom" must be full.." Dib thought.) Poonchy and his desk fell through the floor to a fiery inferno, and a new desk for Zo appeared.
 "POONCHY!" ZIM, Dib, and the few remaining "original" classmates (The Letter M, Keef, Chunk, Melvin, and Zootch) cried. "Whose gonna say stuff in a funny voice now?" Chunk said, melancholy. As everyone mourned their fallen classmate, Zo took her seat and looked lovingly at Dib. "Aww, he's so cute when he's sad.." she thought. Vix shot her a look, saying, "You wanna go another round?" Zo smirked, and threw herself and Vix out the window perfectly. During the tussle, Zo's mask fell off, revealing she was (gasp) an Irken!

 Dib groaned, and stepped in front of the class. "okay, who ISN'T an alien in this class?" Only a few new kids raised their hands, Dib and most of the original class (including ZIM, who Dib glared at and said, "We'll talk about this later, space boy!"). Everyone looked at Zootch weird, as he hadn't raised his hand. Nervously, he raised his hand, and everyone went about their business.

 ZIM stood up, "You're ALL after my mission, Irkens I never met! No one steals ZIM's mission, FAKES!"

 There were  various random outbursts:

 "But I'm a Vortian, pay attention like Dib!"

 "Aw, c'mon ZIM, bro, I'm not after your mission!"

 "That's an unfair generalization, y'all!"

 "I'm only half-Irken!"

 "You're cute, ZIM!"

"Hello! I'm a human, darling!"

 "Unentgeltlichen deutschen!"

 Vix walked up to the window, taking a break from killing Zo, "I'm not after your mission, roomie! Besides, I'm a genetically-altered EvIrken. DISTINCTION!" Zo stood up. "There's a mission you're on, ZIM? Since when?" Vix tackled Zo in response.

 ZIM had had it. He turned to the girl behind him (the Vortian named Kal-Lee, who transferred here last week), and stuck a needle in her hand, taking a DNA sample. "Owie! This is why I like Dib, you Irken creep! I hope the Resisty wipes your kind out!" Kal-Lee whined. He then proceeded to take samples from everyone.

  When ZIM went home, he went to work on his newest, most sinester device.

 The next day, a girl with a short, multi-colored bob dressed  like a motorcyclist stood before the class. "Hi, my name's Jaz. I'm new here."

 In an uncanny resemblance to last Valentine's Day, everyone monotoned, "Hello, Ta...we mean Jaz." Suddenly, Melvin was "transferred" to the underground classroom. As Jaz walked to her seat, she stopped at ZIM's desk, and hugged his head to her chest. "ZIMMY! I want you to know, when the Tallest inevitably tell you your mission is a lie, you can always come to me, sweetheart!" She started stroking his cheek.

 ZIM growled, shoving her away. "LIAR!" He shouted. He then pulled out a giant chemical bomb and turned it on. "DIE! DIE! DIE!" He screeched like a maniac. He then started laughing psychotically.  

 The bomb went off, spewing chemicals on every student. Then, everyone (the new kids and the old kids) started to melt in their own unique, special way. Dib turned to ZIM. "I never thought I'd say this, but thank you, ZIM!" ZIM smiled triumphantly. "But, why did you set it to kill the oth.." He then remembered this was ZIM, after all. "Never mind." 

 Then Dib started feeling hot and sweaty. Then a good chunk of his head started to ooze off. He looked at ZIM, whose face was melting as well. "You put DNA samples of us in there, too." ZIM had a look of realization. "GIR!" He shouted. "You weren't supposed to put my DNA in there! Now the acid is melting my genetic signature, too!" 

 "You jerk." Dib said furiously.

 THE END.

 Well, there it is! I'm planning on doing more "Overused Plot Parodies" in the future. Bye! 

Read The Second One Here!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Lame ZIM Halloween "Costumes"


 One of my pathological fears is that someday, someone will make really trampy INVADER ZIM costumes. I'm talking something like GIR's Doggy Suit with a short-french maid-eske skirt and a low neckline, or something like that. *shudders*

 Well, I've finally found some ACTUAL ZIM costumes via (where else?) Hot Topic, (as in, not cosplay), and while they're (thankfully) not naughty (but then again, they are are modeled for boys), they....... are kinda lame.

 Now you can enjoy them!

1. GIR KIT


So much effort put into this...
  Here's one of those "I'm too cool to wear a real costume" costumes. It's supposed to be partially GIR's Doggy Suit.

Yeah, this only really works if you wear a green shirt and black pants.


"GIR" in a snowstorm

 Here it is on the model.

 Sorry, it's fuzzy, but yeah, it's not fabulous. But, yeah, way to try!

2. MASKS

 Think a headband's too girly? Don't like zipper necklaces? Tail makes your butt look fat? No problem! Here's the answer to the laziness!



Deep down, he's crying....


 YES! You too can wear a lame mask! Suddenly, you're in a fantastic costume! Isn't it fabulous?

 But hey, you no-likey GIR? Have a friend you wants to match you in laziness? NO PROBLEM!


The hair and chin ruin the effect.
 IT COMES IN ZIM STYLE, TOO! ISN'T IT PEACHY?

 Yeah, see? Sooooooo lame. I dressed up as Human Disguise ZIM last year, and made my own eyes and painted my face. It looked better and showed more effort..... And didn't have my face ruin the "illusion"....

3. GIR'S DOGGIE SUIT-HOODIE-SACK COSTUME-THINGY!

 The last one I saw, ACTUALLY showed what resembled effort:
"IT'S NOT A DRESS, DUDES!"
 Not much, but "effort".
Yeah, it's still, kinda lame. And how much would YOU pay for this? $20? $10? That last sticky Lifesaver mint in your pocket that's covered in lint and a penny on the back? NO! 'CAUSE IT'S $50! *facepalms*

Uh, no. I'm not paying that much...

So that was my thoughts on the costumes I found. There was an overwhelming ONE actual ZIM "costume", and the rest were, surprise-surprise, GIR. I am not happy that Dib has been left out again. He NEVER gets his own merchandise and was a big part of the show? WHY HE NO GET A LAME, MILDLY CRAPPY "COSTUME" TOO? And no Gaz either for the girls?

 Wait, I just remembered my "trampy costumes" comment, maybe that's a blessing....

Anyway, I have a LOT more to say about lame/horrible Halloween Costumes, so stay tuned!

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Weekend Artwork #2: Jhonen Scarecrow!


 It's Art Time Again! So InvaderCON 2: DoomCON was announced this week, and it's going to be in... *drumroll* Los Angeles, CA! Dang it, it's not close to me! AND this year, they'll actually have JHONEN VASQUEZ THERE! Dang it, they're mocking me......

 Anyway, according to a post on Twitter, here is his reason.

Why would I actually attend an INVADERCON? When else will so many fans be in one room with a dynamite-packed scarecrow I send in my place?

 Aww, can't you feel the love? This time, it's a relatively quick and painless death. WE'RE GROWING ON HIM, I TELLS YA!

 *ahem* Anyway, so that has inspired me to make this: THE SCARECROW!


The creepy smile means it's working...
 I kinda modeled it after the cameo him from IZ. Hmm.... wonder if this is gonna start a whole trend of people making "Jhonen-Crows". Or would it be "Scare-Jhonens"? "Scare-Vasquez's"? "Vasquez-Crows"? Eh... whatever, I'm digressing, it's not so important....

There it is! Come back next week for another pic!

Thursday, September 1, 2011

It Feeds On Noodles Fanscript (HAPPY BIRTHDAY JHONEN VASQUEZ!)

    Yup, today is the birthday of the fantastic Jhonen Vasquez, creator of INVADER ZIM. So, how to celebrate and honor the day? WITH THIS HERE FANSCRIPT OF AN EPIC-SOUNDING ZIM EPISODE CONCEPT, OF COURSE!

 Here we go! I will have something at the end.
*Insert "I don't own ZIM" disclaimer here, blah blah blah*

                                                           IT FEEDS ON NOODLES

 SCRIPT BY LOVEABLE FREAK
                                 
SCENE: INT. ZIM'S BASE, KITCHEN, NIGHT

(An impatient ZIM is seen sitting at the table, fiddling with a spoon, as GIR hacks away at A WHITE THING ON THE COUNTER. The camera is slowly zooming down on them from above)

(Camera switches from overhead to facing them)

  ZIM

(DROPS SPOON, SCREAMING) GIR! WOULD YOU HURRY UP!? (ANGRY, BUT NOT SCREAMING) My belly is rumbling... (ZIM HEARS RUMBLING, SHOUTS) SILENCE! OBEY ZIM!

 (GIR quits hacking the thing, picks it up, carries it to the table and presents his FANTASTICALLY HORRIBLE LUMP OF SOAP to ZIM) 
GIR
(PROUD) I MADE A PIGGY!

(ZIM stares at the "pig", ZIM's eye twitches. As ZIM prepares to tell GIR off, the doorbell rings. GIR drops the piggy, which in-turn becomes soapy mush, puts on the DOGGIE SUIT, and flies off-screen)

(GIR bursts back on-screen after his brief absence, revealing he got CHINESE TAKEOUT)

 (CONTINUOUS: GIR struggles with opening chopsticks as ZIM yells.)

ZIM
GIR! How DARE you bring me... (disgusted) EARTH food for supper! Are you conspiring...

(GIR trimphantly gets the chopsticks open, but they fly off screen)

GIR
(PLEASED) I GOT IT!

(Camera turns to see ZIM has the chopsticks lodged in his forehead. ZIM, obviously, is HOWLING IN PAIN)

(ZIM runs around screaming things at GIR, arms flailing around, then he runs into the table, his head flat on the top of the table, and his screams finally abruptly stop.)

(ZIM gets up, sighing grogily, but something is different. He now has two "pricks" on his forehead and two chopsticks protruding from his top teeth)

GIR
(Gasps) You got fangs......

(GIR gets ZIM a mirrior, ZIM stares at his reflection intently, as he absent-mindedly bites a take-out box and slurps noodles)

ZIM
Hmm... I appear to have become a vampire. Strange, ZIM is not hungry for blo...

(ZIM realizes his actions and freaks out, throwing the box across the room and freaks out)

 ZIM
(Horrified) I HAVE BECOME A VAMPIRE FOR THE CHINESE FOOD! (terrrorfied) I.. I must fight it, or I will KILL myself with the (low) delichousness.

(ZIM stands there a beat, then attacks the food, mauling the food in such a gruesome manner it's surprising such violence could be achieved. Cut to GIR watching, mourning his dinner. ZIM rises from his meal, licks his "lips", puts on his wig and contacts, and adds a cheap vampire cape to the costume, he lifts his cape in front of his face dramatically, and laughs sinesterly)

SCENE: OUTSIDE, A CITY SIDEWALK, LATER THAT NIGHT

(DIB and GAZ are walking down the sidewalk (continueous), GAZ carrying a plastic bag)

DIB
 I can't believe Dad had us pick up dinner this late at night. Alone.

(GAZ looks at DIB and scoffs, then turns away. Out of nowhere, ZIM leaps into the scene and tackles GAZ, pining her to the sidewalk. DIB rushes to intervene, but ZIM shoves him to the ground)

(ZIM laughs, then salavates. He grabs GAZ'S TAKE-OUT BAG, stands up, and rips out a take-out box, and gruesomely devours the food in front of GAZ. Intercut between GAZ being splattered with food and DIB reaching out to his sister dramatically)

 DIB
(In Horror, Continuous) NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

(ZIM finishes, licking his lips, then hisses at Dib. Then he leaps off-screen, stage right)

(DIB finally thinks to get up and runs to GAZ) GAZ! You okay?

 GAZ
(wiping her face, angry) Do I LOOK alright? (clutches her napkin furiously) He got food ALL OVER ME!

DIB
That alien! He must have turned into a vampire!

GAZ
He's not a vampire, he's a moron, Dib....

DIB
(chuckles) Gaz, Gaz, Gaz. I'm a paranormal expert. I think I know a vampire when I see one.

GAZ
You're not an expert, you're also a moron....

(DIB ignores GAZ, reaches into his jacket and pulls out a wooden stake, then, for the sake of cool, puts on sunglasses. He grips his stake, then poses dramatically. His eye twicthes, and he drops stake)

DIB
Ow. Splinter.

(DIB puts on glove, grabs his stake again, then runs after ZIM, screaming like a maniac)

CUT TO A RESTERAUNT CALLED CHOPSTICKY'S
SCENE: INT. CHOPSTICKY'S, CONT. NIGHT

(ZIM bursts into the resteraunt, no one takes notice, he walks up to SOME TEENAGR WITH STUFF IN HIS EAR AT THE COUNTER)

ZIM
(LOW VOICE) Hello, human. I require ALL your deelishous.... (NORMAL ZIM-SPEAK) I MEAN REVOLTING! SICK... (Back to Low Voice that's becoming scary) Food......

STUFFED -EAR TEEN
(drawn out) You got flu?

ZIM
(Back to his normal voice, angry) NO! I WANT FOOD!

STUFFED-EAR TEEN
Kung-Fu?

ZIM
PATHETIC NO-LISTENING ZIT-CREATURE! (Enunciates) I. WANT. FOOD.

STUFFED_EAR TEEN
Water...

(ZIM growls in frustration and fury, and leaps over the counter, through the service window, out of sight. Food flies out everywhere, pan to the left, as the chefs flee through the door, but one collapses in the doorway, his hand running down the door leaving a soy sauce trail)

(DIB noncholantly walks into the resteraunt, up to STUFFED-EAR TEEN)

DIB
Hey, have you seen...

(A half-eaten eggroll hits STUFFED-EAR TEEN in the back of the head. He falls over, writhing)

STUFFED-EAR TEEN
I'M HIT!

(ZIM looks out the window, grins evilly, licks his lips, but steam is seen coming out. He winces and growls. DIB notices and leaps for ZIM. ZIM dodges and and lunges at DIB)

(ZIM pins DIB down, as DIB tries to stake ZIM. ZIM bites DIB's hand with the stake, and DIB cries out in pain, letting go of the stake, letting it roll away)

ZIM
(Whispers) Help.... me....

(DIB uses this to kick ZIM off him. He shoves a service cart at ZIM, pinning him to the wall, DIB jumps on top the cart)

ZIM
Dib! I will be destroyed by this human food.

DIB
Good!

ZIM
But.... But.... (gets an idea) If I'm killed, how will you prove I'm an alien?

(DIB ponders this question, sighs, and yanks the chopsticks out of ZIM's mouth)

(ZIM screeches, then sighs contently, then shoves the cart away. ZIM rips off his cape and exits)

SCENE: INT. ZIM'S BASE: LIVING ROOM, STILL NIGHT

(ZIM enters the base, GIR stands in front of him)

GIR
(DUTY MODE) Master! Do you require me to initiate Plan B? (pulls out stake)

ZIM
(content) No, GIR. No. 

(GIR snaps out of Duty Mode, and gives ZIM a *Lick-Stick)
*Note: I think that's the term for ZIM's "Fun Dip" Stuff is called

ZIM
It's ALL over.

(ZIM eats Lick-Stick)
CUT TO SCENE: DIB'S BATHROOM, YUP, IT'S STILL NIGHT

(DIB rumages through medicine cabinet)

GAZ: (off-screen) DIB! FOOD!

(DIB closes the cabinet, he looks at the reflection on the mirror, and smiles evilly, revealing little chopstick fangs)

THE END?

 Well, there it is. Feedback, please.

 And Happy Birthday, Jhonen Vasquez. May you forever question sleep, you twisted, undisputed lord of awesome, you!