Thursday, September 20, 2012

Dear CBS, No. Just... No. Sincerely, A Sherlockian (Or: "Sherlock Holmes, Ur Doin It Wrong")

  Okay, I'm postponing my daily chapter-thing and will do a double-post Friday. Why? To vent.

  So, last night I rang in the unofficial end of summer by watching the season finale of Big Brother 14 on CBS. ( I wasn't really rooting for anyone, because I disliked all three finalists, in case you were wondering.) And, of course, an ad for Elementary came on. You know, because it premieres September 27th, and all.

  Anyway, I had seen this commercial before, but didn't pay attention. I saw, but did not observe. But I digress. And this time, I did pay attention. And I wasn't pleased.

  So, it's pretty straightforward. Blah blah blah,  Jonny Lee Miller without a shirt, ladies. Ooh. Blah blah blah, it looks like Millerlock's flirting with Joan Watson. Blah blah blah, it's just the "predicting the dialogue" fake-out scene from the trailers. Blah blah blah, other stuff. And it boasts about how this Sherlock is "cockier" (wait, that's possible?) "sexier" (Oh, Doyle must be rolling in his grave. I read he had an issue with the illustrator of the stories, Sidney Paget, drawing Holmes "too handsome"... Besides, Miller can't top the attractiveness of RDJ or Cumberbatch!) and something else-ier (insert snarky comment here).

  But I had no problem with those things. No....

  Our little friend from the trailer's back. You remember her? I ranted about the implications of her in one of my previous posts? Yeah, well, this ad gives us more insight into that. And, well, from what I interpreted, I think my worst fear is what they were implying.

*ahem* Allow this clip from Atop The Fourth Wall to summarize my feelings...

   If they are, indeed, implying that Millerlock was... GAH! I can't say/type it! You guys get the idea, right? Anyway, that's where I draw the line. Classic Sherlock Holmes is pretty much asexual. He's not interested in that sort of thing, okay? He doesn't have time for women, he has stuff to deduce!
  Now, before anyone brings up the other recent works, let me explain. I don't mind the Downeylock/McAdams's Irene Adler ("McAdler"? I dunno. I really need to create more nicknames...) shenanigans/relationship because I like how it was handled. I dug the Batman/Catwoman dynamic. And it was only Adler he showed that sort of interest in. I know that Holmes and Adler being in a relationship is just something the adaptions tend to do. It's like the deerstalker or "Elementary, my dear Watson"; something people just assumed/ took it and ran with it.
  (Plus, Downeylock's played by Robert Downey Jr. He kind of does as he pleases. Deal with it. :P)
  And as for Sherlock, he specifically said relationships "weren't his area." Yes, there was Lara Pulver's Adler in "A Scandal in Belgravia", but with how that episode happened, I doubt a relationship is ever gonna happen. And as much as I love Molly Hooper and would like Cumberlock to throw the poor woman a bone, I know it ain't happening!
 My problem with this is just seemingly some random woman in Elementary Millerlock appears to have had a fling with. And it raises the question if he's done such a thing before. That's NOT Sherlock to me. If it were an original character, I wouldn't mind. But this is SHERLOCK. FREAKING. HOLMES!
  I mean, what, did they take the whole "romantic experience with women from three continents" thing from Watson and think: "Nah, we can't have Joan doing that. They might think less of her. Let's give it to the other member of the duo!" Seriously, Millerlock, I was hoping you would do good and not pull this sort of thing!
  Okay, maybe I'm being a bit harsh and over-critical. I haven't even SEEN the show, this is just speculation. It's just, I want this not to be terrible. I really do. I want to be optimistic. There is stuff that makes me hopeful. But there's still this pessimistic voice in my head saying "this will be awful! Terrible! A disaster! A horrible disaster!" GAH!YOU ARE TEARING ME APART, ELEMENTARY!

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